Let’s imagine you have landed in your dreamy destination; soft sandy beaches, clear skies and a laid back resort. You’ve been dreaming about it for months as the antidote for a very busy year. Yet, now that you’ve arrived, unwinding proves to be a challenge as your mind and body struggle to let go of stress. So, what’s the secret to truly decompressing and making the most of your much-anticipated vacation?
As a psychologist I know that it can be difficult for those with busy jobs and lives to wind down. Physiologically our bodies adapt to high levels of stress and so when we arrive on vacation it can take several days to begin to unwind. Similarly, in our busy lives our brain is used to processing lots of information, weighing it up, planning and responding quickly. It can take some time and practise to allow our minds to step out of this mode and begin to be more present and connected.
So with this in mind, here are my top tips for relaxing and de-stressing on vacation
- Use relaxation techniques
Relaxation techniques include breathing techniques, guided meditation, imagery techniques and mindfulness. There is a reason why these are top of every therapist’s recommendation list; they work. Physiologically learning to focus on the here and now helps us to engage our parasympathetic nervous system, our body’s relaxation mode. The more we practise these techniques, the easier it will be to move into this mode when we need to.
- Limit screen time
Smartphones mean that we can access unlimited information at the touch of a button, which is very unhelpful when we want to detach and relax. In our day to day lives we are primed for responding to information quickly, and so when we are trying to relax and restore, it is important to switch our attention away from the online world, and into the here and now.
I would strongly advise you against checking your emails when you’re away because it can switch your body and brain back into work mode very quickly. It can be so tempting to think “I’ll just answer this one email” which may only take a few minutes, but don’t underestimate the impact that will have on your mindset and physiology. Answering an email will act as a cue for your brain and body to kickstart work mode. If you have to respond to emails have clear boundaries around this, for example only being available at a specified and limited time each day.
Similarly with social media, limit the time that you spend. Whilst social media can be enjoyable for many of us, it is cleverly designed to capture and maintain our attention. To protect ourselves from this, it is important to set limits so that it doesn’t eat into our vacation time, or our peace.
- Prioritise connection
Vacation time is an ideal time to connect with your travel companions away from the stresses of everyday life. These positive experiences can help us to strengthen and cement our relationships for life’s challenges. Connection with other people is closely associated with our body’s soothing system and so focusing on connection can help us to feel relaxed and safe. This is one of the reasons why social support is consistently one of the best predictors of mental well-being and resilience.
Whilst on vacation, make it your intention to re-connect with your travel companions; focus on them, ask how they’re doing, use humour, be playful, be kind and understanding to them. Talk to them about how you feel and be open and honest. These gestures tend to be reciprocal and can help you to cement your relationship as well as wind down from the stresses of life.
- Incorporate movement
Physical activity can help us to de-stress, so think about how you can incorporate movement into your trip. The key thing is that it is enjoyable for you. Activities like yoga, swimming and gentle walks are ideal.
- Consider a buffer zone before your trip
When we have busy jobs and lives it can be tempting, and sometimes necessary to have a very hectic period leading up to our vacation. This inevitably means that you will spend the first few days of your trip trying to wind down. To be proactive in preventing this, it can be helpful to take steps to begin to switch into vacation mode in the 2-3 days before your trip. This will look different for each person, but be intentional about using these days to gradually wind down your projects and responsibilities. Avoid taking the mindset of trying to fit as much as possible in before you go away as this is really going to put your body into threat mode, which is more difficult to wind down from.
- Create cues for relaxation
One of our most fundamental forms of learning is association. This is when our brain makes links between an object in the outside world and an internal feeling. There are thousands of examples of this; strawberries signifying the spring feeling, new stationery being linked to the excitement and focus of a new project, a wind down routine signalling time for sleep.
We can use this to create cues for relaxation and positive emotions, including creating a routine that associate with vacation time. This might include having specific accessories that you use when you go on vacation; a travel jewellery case, a specific perfume or that favourite pair of sunglasses are great examples. Having treasured accessories that we love can help us to glide into vacation mode.
Taking these tips together, my message is about being intentional and proactive and using strategies to wind down. Being in a beautiful and peaceful place won’t automatically promote feelings of bliss, but there are simple steps that we can take to help us to de-stress leading up to and on that dream vacation.
Written by Dr Charlotte Russell, Founder of The Travel Psychologist
